for carmella, who is "in like" & benny, who i love

a kick-off to our almost valentine's month!

we'll sing of his goodness and mercy

to hear about president hinckley's passing away was difficult for me. he was who i would consider, "my prophet." he was there when i gained my own testimony of the book of mormon & again when my testimony was restrengthened about the book through his challenge to read it by the end of the year. he was there when i gained my testimony of the prophet joseph smith, visiting nauvoo, carthidge jail & liberty jail. he was there when i gained my testimony of temples, being in the bountiful temple & listening to him do the temple dedication. he was there when i gained a testimony of the importance of being a "peculiar people." for those reasons and so many more, i am sad to say goodbye to such an amazing man. his sense of humor, his sweetness and above all, his unconditional love reached out to those inside and outside of the church. i am so proud to call him the leader of our church. i remember the first time i was able to actually see him in person....at the dress rehearsal of his 90th birthday party in the conference center. i wasn't sitting close, but the second he entered the room a hush fell over the crowd and the spirit was so strong that i could not deny that this was truly a man of God.

thank you for your example, president hinckley. you will be missed.

ghetto crocker

we had a dessert competition today with the clients & this is what was created out of a couple of cake mixes, a bit of frosting, some sprinkles, & a whole LOT of love.





this is what we here at youthquest would call a "hot mess."

now here's a picture of what the staff created, ben & angel.





and now, here is what happens when the kids cut into it.




that's what we here call a HAM. hot a** mess. eat your hearts out!

pessimism gone bye-bye!

i realize that my last post was a bit of a downer. after reading it, i think that readers may think that i absolutely hate this job & i want to make it known that i don't. i really enjoy so many things about this job & although it's been difficult, i have learned a lot. the benefits & blessings have outweighed the trials & heartaches by far. that doesn't mean, however, that i am not looking forward to the silence that will be coming in 6 months when my life becomes my own again. but i don't consider that pessimism. i consider that a reality that anyone in their right mind would look forward to. can i get an AMEN.

one of "those" days

so i realize that one of "those" days has a different definition to everyone. that could mean that your 5 kids have run rampant through the home, taking off their poopy diapers & fingerpainting, pulling the cat's tail, falling down the stairs & breaking a leg, dumping spaghetti sauce all over the kitchen floor, & putting liquid dish soap in the dishwasher, causing it to overflow with suds & soak & ruin your cheap linoleum floor. or it could mean a busy day at the office, your boss gets mad at you for something you didn't do, everyone else calls in sick to work causing you to pick up the slack, the loony customer decides this is the day to go ape-crazy on your behind & cuss you out in front of everyone, & you get told you don't know how to "prioritize" because you haven't been able to get any of your own duties done.

this is what one of "those" days means to me:

being too exhausted physically & mentally to go into details about how
1) my new nickname, according to fantasia, is b*$#h
2) letting carrot top know that we are reporting his actions to his parole officer, which will most likely result in jail time
3) watching ben & fantasia struggle over a honey-baked ham, leading to a 10 minute stand-off with both of their hands wrapped around a refridgerator, where she continually threatens his life
4) being 'iced in' to the home, unable to go anywhere for 2 days because of the weather that causes the entire state of north carolina to shut down
5) i've given myself about 10 pep talks in the past 2 days to get me through the final 6 months at this job

you have GOT TO BE KIDDING ME

so school was almost cancelled today. why? because they predicted 1 INCH of snow. this has to be some sort of joke. i know it. i know someone is around the corner waiting to yell, "JUST KIDDING! we really aren't pansies who can't drive during a light snowfall!"

instead school was delayed for 2 hours. is there any snow on the ground? nope. but just the possibility of it sent the people of north carolina into a frenzied state. here at the group home we are always in a frenzied state. but it's usually over something significant...say, carrot with a broomstick in his hand and a gleam in his eye. or fantasia screaming at the top of her lungs with snot running down her nose. those to me are worth the frenzied state. not the same as lovely little pieces of frozen water falling from the clouds. but what do i know? i'm just from utah.

ps-it is now two hours after i originally started this post. still have yet to see a flake. at first i thought i saw something, but it was just dandruff on einstein's shoulder. sigh.

boobaly & elders

tonight caleb was in the bathtub & i went up to say hi. caleb wanted me to see all his bubbles. when i commented about them he said, "ya, i'm all boobaly." ben & i started laughing & said "boobaly?" i personally thought that's what pamela anderson is, but i guess there can be more than one definition to a word. here is a picture of caleb being all boobaly.






then the elders stopped by for a visit. things always get exciting when they're around & it always heightens my senses of the lunacy that surrounds me at the group home. for example, while elder jensen was bearing his testimony about not serving two masters, einstein raised his hand. when called on, he said, "i have the devil sitting on one shoulder and former president bill clinton sitting on the other. i base everything i do around what one or the other tells me." here is a picture i can post of the elders, because none of the clients are in there (at least not enough to recognize), you get the idea of the amount of torture they go through each time they visit. they put new meaning into the phrase "charity suffereth long, and is patient." thanks guys, for putting up with it.

the day of reckoning

carmella & i took carrot top to court yesterday for him to face the felony charges that he got for the more than the thousands of dollars worth of damage he did to the home & the company van in august. that was the same fateful day that ben had to restrain this big boy, rolling around on our front lawn. i did get the chance to pin down his legs. woo hoo.

anyway, we're in court. i can't even describe the caliber of people sitting on all sides of us. there was the old old man sitting next to carmella. usually i am in full support of people wearing sandals without socks. this man broke the mold with the nastiest, driest, most cracked feet i have ever seen. forget the faux paux, put some socks on!!

then there's the strung out african american lady sitting behind us. from the looks of things she forgot both her teeth and her bra. along with some common sense. the deputy was trying to get everyone to slide down the benches to make room for those having to stand. she refused. he walked up to the crowd, stared her down and yelled, "EVERYBODY MOVE DOWN TO YOUR RIGHT!!" still no budge, just a stare back, along with the clicking of her empty gums. tension in the room rose. finally the lady next to her started saying "move down! move down!" and shoving her at the same time. luckily, gummy & saggy moved before things turned hectic.

but nothing topped the comment coming from another african-american man who arrived late in court, side-by-side with a very pregnant lady. he yelled this out when they called his name & read his charges. keep in mind he is in COURT. for CHARGES.

"hey, could you speed this up a little? my girl, she be havin contractions."
the deputy looked incredulous.

the best part of this little happily-ever-after is the charges that were being pressed on the two of them:

child endangerment.

living the american dream i guess. welcome to durham, north carolina.

skin pelt part 2

so we all knew einstein was a little different. the comment he made to his teacher regarding his skin pelt being hung on a mantle was disturbing. however we have had an interesting update on the situation.

einstein has been requesting the right to earn having a pet in the home. this is not unusual, ernest has 3 fish & past clients have had hamsters before. einstein has requested mice. wasn't sure why, now i am.

his case manager called us today & said that einstein had been talking to him about earning some mice & gave us a little heads up. turns out that he has raised mice in the past. a little odd, but whatever. the sick & twisted part of the whole deal is the fact that when once of his mice died, einstein's sister said that he WORE THE DEAD MOUSE'S SKIN AROUND HIS FINGER FOR A WEEK.

ask me why i sleep with a bat under my side of the bed. just ask me.

i'm it

i was tagged & it looks like this one is to post some random stuff about myself. could be interesting, more possibly could be quite boring. i think i am pretty much a boring person with an interesting job. but let's see what i can come up with!

**i am 27. wow that sounds old! but my sister thinks that her prime will be in her 30's and i have to say that's a good motto. just gearin up for the fantastic years to come!

**i have one child, although at times he has felt like at least 3 kids. i know people think i am exaggerating because i technically have no idea what it feels like to have 3, but seriously. his first 2 years were a bit nuts.

**once at a family christmas party (shellee & aim you should remember this) my grandparents rented a minnie mouse costume for someone to dress up in & hand out candy canes. i don't know how i got volunteered for the job but i did, and did it with style. apparently the costume was a little old because about halfway through the ordeal, minnie's nose fell off. we didn't know what to do with it so we stuck it in her mouth. hopefully none of the kids noticed. i do remember how stiflingly HOT it was in there, but there are some classic pics because of it. just picture minnie doing a rockettes pose and you've got it.

**i am what i would call a 'closet singer.' i absolutely LOVE to do it & think that i am pretty decent, but if someone asks me to sing in public i FREEZE up. ben thinks i should make a CD. isn't he sweet.

**at some point in my life i played the piano, flute, violin & guitar. i took tap, ballet & jazz dance lessons. what do i do now? manage a group home.

**i am addicted to trashy gossip magazines & shows. since working here, i have to admit i have gotten better. but seriously now...can you BELIEVE that halle berry, jessica alba, jamie lynn spears & countless others are pregnant?? and did you see britney spears strapped into a gurney? my personal opinion is that if she had been put in a group home at an early age, her life would have turned out much differently. in a positive way. pre-justin timberlake. okay i will stop.

**i absolutely HATE the word: 'discharge.' it has taken the #1 spot on my list of words to cringe at well above 'moist.'

**i love to collect hair products. it is crazy. every time we move i have to give away hundreds of dollars of hair products & make-up that have never been used, or used once. you would think i look better than i do. i said i "collect" them i never said i knew how to "use them correctly."

**i don't like to cook. this is something i have had to do my best to overcome now that i cook for 8 people. but i just d-r-e-a-d it. that is ben's #1 complaint about me that he wishes i liked to do it. but i think it works out ok because ben really enjoys cooking. from scratch. can you believe that??? who would EVER want to cook from scratch? my fancy man.

**i crave relationships with others. not "shallow-tons of friends-have tons of parties" type of relationships. but ones that are meaningful & deep & loyal & with people i can trust. that has been ingrained in me since i was a little girl. i try really hard to be the type of friend that i would want to have in my life.

**this job has helped me to be a more patient, kind & empathetic person. it has also pushed me to my limits emotionally and physically. my life has been threatened more times than i can count, i have been sworn at & treated poorly & taken advantage of, but i have never felt closer to my husband or to my heavenly father than i have these past 6 mos. and at the end of the day, i really feel that i have made a positive impact on these kids' lives. i also know i am a better mother to my child & future children from the skills i have learned. so no, lauren, i don't regret the decision. there is the answer to your question...just sometimes i have to think about it before i can answer honestly!

i tag: lauren, kirsten (time for the closet blogger to come out of the closet!), angie hamblin & ben gunn

new moon & eclipse

here is the review i posted on my bookclub blog about these books. loved them!




ok here we go! over christmas break, during the 2 days we had NO CLIENTS HERE (a moment of silence please for how fantastic that was) i had the chance to read the rest of the series. it was great! ok so here are my two cents, for anyone who cares (if you haven't read this series but plan to, don't read on):

1) even though edward is beautiful & perfect & everything else
2) i would pick JACOB!!!

i like a man with a dark, tormented side. that is why i married ben (ha ha!). not that edward doesn't have that but he's just TOOOOO perfect for me. and in the end, i think bella would get tired of it. and then it would be too late, she would be a vampire, and she would have to spend eternity with him. i just am not a hopeless romantic and i would get tired of all those smoochies and perfect compliments and that is all i have to say about that.

so there you go. i am on team jacob. loved the books, can't wait for the movie, can't wait for the 4th book.

***for all you doubters out there, i was one too! read the series!